I'M IN A GLASS CASE OF EMOTION!!
Wow, all these feeeeeeeeelings.
This morning on the way to school Lilly, Oliver and I rapped about how they always lose their gloves and it drives me nuts and within two seconds I was crying along to Lykke Li's new album whilst thinking about something profound my dad once said to me. If your head is spinning from just reading that sentence imagine experiencing that much emotion within a 2 minute time frame! Intense...but also, really awesome.
The emotion seems to be pretty authentic and clear. I can tell when I am sincerely feeling one emotion vs another whereas before I think I would get them confused (as I mentioned before about the anxiety really being bundled up excitement).
Writing is helping me to see all of the changes, no matter how subtle that I may have otherwise missed. It's great motivation for me, and I appreciate you writing to me and encouraging as well. It takes a village...
So this is the beginning of day 3 and it was hard to choke down my juice. The mistake I made when packaging up my assortment of chopped-upness was that they are all kind of within the same flavour spectrum. Also, as I mentioned, I am not "juicing" I am throwing a bunch of fruits and veggies into the nutri-bullet (thus getting all parts of the produce itself). I am looking into buying a juicer and this might probably make things easier because no chopping will really be involved. Chopping is time consuming! Who woulda thunk?
Last night (evening of day 2) was incredibly tempting and challenging.
First, I gave a presentation on Women & Money and of course we had - WINE! It's not like I love wine but I do like a glass to take the edge off at relaxed style presentations. I made it through no problem though and didn't end up with swollen feet (which is what happens when I drink wine)!
Next, I moved on to a friend's birthday dinner at the most fabulous Greek restaurant! Yes I said Greek - go on, salivate while you read this. They were going to be arriving at 7, and I didn't get there until 830 so I was sure that I was going to miss the arrival of the food at least - in all it's savory glory. But alas, I did not miss the arrival of the food. The aroma swept past my nose tantalizingly and left me gulping back my own saliva. I ordered a chamomile tea and a bowl of Greek salad - no dressing, no feta.
Le sigh.
I found myself dreaming of grabbing someone's lamb skewer and sliding it off with my teeth, chewing slowly with my eyes closed in delight. I let these thoughts come up. Once, my hynotherapist told me that we can get that good chemical hit just by thinking about food, not just by eating it. I also had to remind myself that 30 days is not forever, and lamb and steak will be available to me, if I wish, once I am done.
Everyone was going to have drinks after but I opted to go home due to fairly fierce fatigue. I went home and cuddled my children in lieux of some desert and it satisfied me quite nicely - I would say even better than peanut butter pie or a rum and coke.
In short, or long, I am feeling pretty great. I am not hungry and I juice when I want! I am taking care of my energy which feels nice. My bra fit a little bit loser this morning (no pinching) and I was able to zip my coat up without feeling like I was a human sausage.
I do have a little bit of a breakout happening - around my jaw line.
Word to the wise: When cleansing - don't ever trust a fart. Ever.
That is all.
With love and gratitude,
Grace
Wow, all these feeeeeeeeelings.
This morning on the way to school Lilly, Oliver and I rapped about how they always lose their gloves and it drives me nuts and within two seconds I was crying along to Lykke Li's new album whilst thinking about something profound my dad once said to me. If your head is spinning from just reading that sentence imagine experiencing that much emotion within a 2 minute time frame! Intense...but also, really awesome.
The emotion seems to be pretty authentic and clear. I can tell when I am sincerely feeling one emotion vs another whereas before I think I would get them confused (as I mentioned before about the anxiety really being bundled up excitement).
Writing is helping me to see all of the changes, no matter how subtle that I may have otherwise missed. It's great motivation for me, and I appreciate you writing to me and encouraging as well. It takes a village...
So this is the beginning of day 3 and it was hard to choke down my juice. The mistake I made when packaging up my assortment of chopped-upness was that they are all kind of within the same flavour spectrum. Also, as I mentioned, I am not "juicing" I am throwing a bunch of fruits and veggies into the nutri-bullet (thus getting all parts of the produce itself). I am looking into buying a juicer and this might probably make things easier because no chopping will really be involved. Chopping is time consuming! Who woulda thunk?
Last night (evening of day 2) was incredibly tempting and challenging.
First, I gave a presentation on Women & Money and of course we had - WINE! It's not like I love wine but I do like a glass to take the edge off at relaxed style presentations. I made it through no problem though and didn't end up with swollen feet (which is what happens when I drink wine)!
Next, I moved on to a friend's birthday dinner at the most fabulous Greek restaurant! Yes I said Greek - go on, salivate while you read this. They were going to be arriving at 7, and I didn't get there until 830 so I was sure that I was going to miss the arrival of the food at least - in all it's savory glory. But alas, I did not miss the arrival of the food. The aroma swept past my nose tantalizingly and left me gulping back my own saliva. I ordered a chamomile tea and a bowl of Greek salad - no dressing, no feta.
Le sigh.
I found myself dreaming of grabbing someone's lamb skewer and sliding it off with my teeth, chewing slowly with my eyes closed in delight. I let these thoughts come up. Once, my hynotherapist told me that we can get that good chemical hit just by thinking about food, not just by eating it. I also had to remind myself that 30 days is not forever, and lamb and steak will be available to me, if I wish, once I am done.
Everyone was going to have drinks after but I opted to go home due to fairly fierce fatigue. I went home and cuddled my children in lieux of some desert and it satisfied me quite nicely - I would say even better than peanut butter pie or a rum and coke.
In short, or long, I am feeling pretty great. I am not hungry and I juice when I want! I am taking care of my energy which feels nice. My bra fit a little bit loser this morning (no pinching) and I was able to zip my coat up without feeling like I was a human sausage.
I do have a little bit of a breakout happening - around my jaw line.
Word to the wise: When cleansing - don't ever trust a fart. Ever.
That is all.
With love and gratitude,
Grace
Wow what a journey for you.... Loved the visuals you created with this entry :)
ReplyDelete