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Sometimes it's immediately clear why someone graces you with their 'presents"

I really have been wanting to blog lately but I have a bit of writer's block as they say. My blockage deteriorated tonight when I spoke to my trainer.
I have been training with Kasie McCaw who is a world class trainer in my books. I couldn't have asked for a more perfect human being to slide into my fitness journey. Kasie is a wolf in foxy workout gear. That woman is stunning and hard as nails.
Last week she called me to relay the bitter sweet news that she was leaving her business to pursue an offer she couldn't refuse with another gym. I have to admit that although as happy for her as any friend/client and fellow female warrior could be, I was devastated. I have become so reliant on Kasie to kick my ass. I loved her for it even on the days I wanted to cry she would see me struggling and tell me to get out of my head, stop talking negatively to myself and to recognize how amazing I was doing - her delivery never left me doubting that what she was saying was 100% genuine.
She called me tonight to explain how her career move came about and to tie up lose ends on our sessions since she is having to leave earlier than she thought. What am amazing opportunity, I hope her new employers know how lucky they are! I genuinely told her how happy I was but I am not going to hide the fact that I had a huge lump in my throat. She's like my gym soul mate...
She asked me what I was going to do to keep fit in between now and when the new gym she will be at will be open? I really had no idea, I felt like a lost puppy. I was working out at home but I wasn't even coming close to pushing myself like she does in our sessions together. Since working with her, I have never felt stronger and I have also never seen such drastic changes from a Tuesday to a Thursday of the same week.
As she made suggestions, I came up with so many excuses as to why I didn't like this gym or that gym - too far, no showers, too expensive etc etc. Working out at home seems convenient and simple but there are so many distractions. Running buddies are great but schedules conflict and either I am holding someone up or vice versa. So I said to her "I don't know what my real issue is? All these excuses are just that, none of them are real. Why don't I just do what I need to do to be healthy and keep my body strong and fit?" Kasie understood so well that a lot of women don't feel that they deserve to have that time to pursue their own health and fitness goals and after we do our motherly duties and push hard to pursue our careers (which we put all of our energy into) what do we have left to give ourselves? Having her cut through my bullshit in an empathetic understanding way really showed me how great she truly is. We talked about the fear of success and actually feeling deserving of that. Just hearing her, the expert on training, tell me that what I was feeling was not only normal but common amongst women and more specifically mothers helped me to feel like I could rise above it all, get my butt in gear and as Nike has always said - just do it.
Kasie didn't just tell me what to do and how to do it, but she helped me plow through my fears and personally set limitations.

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