Journey to Mee-dom

I'm always thinking about what people think. Mostly what do they think of me? What's their impression of me? What I do, how I look, but mostly what I say. I think that this contributes to my body image issues. It's really friggen exhausting caring so damn much about something you can't control - what other people think. Or can you? Can't you try to be everything to all people and then, surely then everyone will LOVE you!?! When I get home from a day full of meetings with clients my head and my "heart" are so worn out from trying to get inside other people's heads and not only asses their financial hopes and dreams but also what they think of me. I watch myself go straight to the fridge. It's like nicotine for some people. Once it touches my lips relief washes over me. I'm a food addict. There I said it. When it comes to my weight, and meeting new people, I am seriously thinking to myself "I should tell them this isn't the real me. Tha...

In my struggle to loose weight, even through crossfit and a much better diet, my mind has been blown by my self awareness towards: My fear of intimacy. It's directly related to my weight gain/retention. "Grace afraid of intimacy? She spills her guts to anyone who will listen! She doesn't get embarrassed or hold back. She speaks her mind and says whatever she feels the urge to say." Well my friends that is not intimacy for me. Read on. One definition of intimacy (keeping in mind it's not always sex) is " closeness: a feeling of being intimate and belonging together". It might sound cliche, or cheesy but over the last week or so I have a profound realization - an epiphany really, that dawned on me during a conversation with my friend Carly. I won't go into too much personal detail but we were discussing feeling "scared" of closeness, of commitment, expectations and essentially, intimacy. I felt a pretty strong sinking feeling in m...